Mystery Shower

I had a woman look at me all misty eyed and say to me, “There is something about a hot shower that just washes your cares away and sets you free. It cleanses your soul.”

Duuuuuhhh.

Come on.  Is a shower really all that much of a mystery?  Hmmm, what is this “something”? I call for an investigation. Watson! My eyeglasses! Let’s look at it. Break it down. Analyze.

Here are the key points:
1. Nakedness – in the shower you are in your purest form, stripped away from the make-up, the layer of clothes that makes you fit in or stand out, the pressures, the labels…. just human.
2. Water – people have been using water as a symbol of purity and cleanliness since …well God.
3. Quiet and Solitude – besides the occasional inappropriate behavior that takes away what I said in #2 and the personal concert to see if you can really hit a note like Mariah can, in the shower you are alone with your thoughts. This is the same reason why people say that the best ideas come to you when you are on the john or during hose moments right before you go to sleep – because you let yourself think. You know why some (not all, but some) people are so in love with being in nature, because of this same reason, you are alone with yourself! It IS something precious, to be alone with your thoughts, because in our super connected society, it is hard to come by.

So yes misty lady, there is beauty in a shower. You actually get to hang out with the amazing and beautiful machine that is the human brain. My hair is wet right now in fact and man wasn’t that one of my greatest ideas ever. I got it in my magic shower. *wink*

Sufficient Labeling.

I like to label things. But not vaguely. For instance, take the word “cool.” Very vague, even when defining temperature. I think there should be three distinct categories of what we label as “cool.” That is why I am going to break it down. Drum roll please. *eh-hem* We should more efficiently and effectively break those we wish to compliment into three categories: hip, cool, and awesome. This would give cool its very own unique subset, as well as allow for two other just-as-important-and-valuable subsets. Let me define:

Hip: A person who knows the latest hit single and knows what new innovations work the cat walks of the world. This person is the one who always asks, “Hey have you heard of…” To which, you always akwardly reply “yea,” hoping that you are not then bombarded with a series of questions on that topic. Questions which then out you as an impostor.

Cool: A person who knows everyone, who likes everyone, and seems to WITHOUT EFFORT make everyone like him or her. Notice the caps. Without effort is important here. I mean look at the word – cooooool. It implies laid back, not too frigid to break things and not too warm to be make you sweat. This person usually likes physical contact. The unique handshake, the fist pump, the kiss on both sides of the cheek even – all invented by a “cool.”

Awesome: A person who is confident in who they are and bothers only to be themselves and rock it. This is the person who skateboards on public sidewalks, who belts out Pat Benetar in traffic, who wears a red lace dress that covers her face to the MTV Music Awards. Even if you think these types might seem haughty or, on the other hand, outsiders, if they are still being themselves they are “awesome.”

Sometimes a person doesn’t have to be placed just in one category. Instead, they could be a combination, at times cool, maybe a little hip in one category or two, and then awesome in shining moment.

Myself: 70% awesome, 10% Hip, 20% Cool (Although I have invented handshakes)